To Build A Home
As an introvert, I take comfort in the solace and places I have made my own. I tend to carve spaces for myself in many different ways. Whether I hang my pictures in the living room, or put my books next to my friends’ on our shared bookshelf, creating a shared space where everyone can feel comfortable and loved is very important to me. College is a time of creating a home away from home, whether that be with people, or at a two-foot by two-foot dining table. Being away from home or in spaces you’re sharing with others can be difficult, so here are a few options you can use to liven up your shared spaces, or even your own section of wall above your bed, as well as some advice for living with people you might have never met before.
Above the headboard of my bed, I have taped string lights in the shape of stars to the wall. String lights not only provide a nice comforting glow, but can also act as a nightlight, reading light, or the perfect backdrop for pictures. Hanging artwork above your bed, or notes of encouragement from friends can also be calming. I have an array of comforting verses and peaceful drawings hung above my bed that help me fall asleep some nights. I also have a small fan next to my bed, and I recommend getting one for yourself. Not everyone in your living situation may want to keep the house at a temperature you like, so it’s always nice to have extra blankets at the end of your bed, and a fan on your bedside table.
Even if you feel like strangers with the people you are living with, I highly recommend working together to decorate your shared living spaces. Some things my roommates and I did were rearrange the furniture to our liking in the living room, hang up string lights above our shared record player, and drape brightly colored party decor along the tops of the sliding doors we have in our home.
It is a firm belief of mine that dining tables are where some of the most important conversations happen, and so creating a welcoming space in our dining room was of great importance to me. We got in the habit of buying a bouquet of flowers every week to put in the middle of our dining table (You can get some beautiful ones at Trader Joe’s for five dollars). Once they had almost run their course and we got a new bouquet, I would take the bouquet and hang it upside down from the beams in our dining room to dry out. They make for cheap and beautiful decor. We also have a watercolor painting made by a friend for us in our dining room that adds a beautiful touch to the room. If you don’t have any artwork from friends, you can make some yourself by tracing simple lines from pictures you like and placing them in a nice frame, or even printing a picture you really enjoy off the internet (however be aware of the possibility of stealing someone else’s artwork).
If you have enough room, designate a place to do classes/homework/school and only do work there. Everyone in my house has specific places they work at, and even if you work outside, you can still make that space feel more like yours. If you’re working on a chair not so comfortable, get some pillows or blankets to support your lower back. If you have a workspace near or against a wall, tape up encouraging quotes, or reasons you enjoy the subjects you’re taking. I have had to include many reasons above my desk for why I love my chosen career; I just don’t particularly enjoy a specific class I have to take to get my degree. I also recommend, if possible, having a clock that is not your phone near your workspace. Keeping track of your breaks and your study time is important. While passing a class may be important, your mental health is just as, if not more important. Take a break if you need to.
Living in a new place can be intimidating, especially if you’re living with people you’ve never met before. By creating a space where people can feel comfortable not only existing in, but also living in, then you can better your relationships and community. Don’t be afraid to ask permission to move stuff or add things, but also be aware that shared spaces are places where everyone should feel comfortable. If someone isn’t comfortable with an idea, then don’t push for it. Allow your home to truly be a home. Foster community. Eat as many meals together as you can. And make sure you keep compassion for yourself in all things.
By: Ella Michael